People Pleasing: Fear of Rejection for my Beliefs

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By: Amanda Frittz

I’ve always struggled with standing up for my beliefs when met with opposition. Whether it was out of fear of experiencing rejection or making others feel rejected and judged.

I’ve been convicted over and over again to change this recently. God calls us to be bold and courageous in our faith. Honestly, up until recently, I’ve ignored that calling for my own personal comfort.

Fear of Rejection

Acts 28:31 “Proclaiming the kingdom of God and teaching about the Lord Jesus Christ with all boldness and without hindrance.”

In the recent past I have been hit with opportunity after opportunity to reveal God’s truth to people around me, and over and over I have failed to do so. I know God has forgiven me, but I also know he’s going to keep giving me opportunities to reject his truth or tell it boldly.

Have you heard of the foot-in-the-door technique? It’s a psychological term to explain the phenomenon where if you say “yes” to small things you are more likely to say “yes” to big things. With this thought in mind, I think it’s important to begin playing out my hearts convictions around friends so I can stay bold in my faith if I’m ever faced with higher stakes.

I Denied My Hearts Convictions Last Month

Just last month I was celebrating my friends birthday and she wanted to play Cards Against Humanity. I felt uneasy about playing it but I didn’t stand up for my hearts conviction out of fear of rejection and ruining the party. Instead, I played it begrudgingly and honestly couldn’t really enjoy myself or my time with close friends.

After the party ended, I called my friend and revealed that I was feeling guilty about playing Cards Against Humanity earlier that night. To my surprise, she revealed she had felt uncomfortable playing and listening to many of the cards as well. After talking it over, we realized we hadn’t wanted to ruin anyone’s night by playing a different party game.

Romans 10:17 “So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God”

In hindsight I find that really sad and eye-opening. We allowed ourselves to be fed awful phrases and words so that we would not ruin anyone’s night. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing the word of God, so I wonder what kind of destruction hearing lies and grotesque phrases overtime does to our souls and our faith.

From my past experience, listening and participating in worldly things normalizes them. They start to seem less and less shocking. It’s not until you step away and pray for clarity that you begin to see the snowball effect of destruction it can have on your life.

In my example of Cards Against Humanity, although the phrases may seem harmless because it’s playful it is ultimately normalizing disrespectful things. Some of the cards go as far as to mention parents, grandmas, or other figures that should be respected. The word “God” is even a card to play, and often ends up being played in a way that is blasphemous and normalizes mocking God.

I Want to Find my Value in God

Know that I say all of this in humbleness, as I myself didn’t stick up for the convictions God had placed on my heart. Going forward, I do intend to stick up for my hearts convictions no matter what. However, I have comfort knowing that if I stumble God will forgive me.

1 John 2:1 My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.

As I find my identity in Christ I continue to care less about people pleasing and more about honoring God. It’s been a gift to grow bolder in my faith and convictions. I can’t wait to pursue God with more boldness and passion than ever before.

John 15:18 “If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you.

Dear Lord,

Thank you for your enduring love and patience. Thank you for not giving up on us when we are disobedient and for molding our hearts to your word. I pray over myself and my readers that we will be filled with courage and boldness. Help us to release any fear of rejection from man, and only have a desire to be accepted by you. I pray that we delve deep in your word and arm ourselves for battle. Father, I pray that we find our strength and our image in you Lord. I Pray that you put convictions on our hearts and that we have the obedience and courage to see them through. Lord, I pray that you will let us have a deeper understanding of your unconditional love Lord so that we may have soft hearts that want to serve you. In Jesus’s name Amen.